DISCERNMENT, PART III. . .

In discernment I move into and beyond my feelings, thoughts and my reasoning about what God is calling me to.  I strive to be guided by God’s Spirit.  Discernment does not imply that I will fully comprehend God’s call.  It does raise the question: What is the next step God is calling me to take?

For me, Discernment is more ‘apprehending’ than ‘comprehending.’  Michael Polanyi in his wonderful book, ‘Personal Knowledge,’ captures this for me: ‘Things which we can tell, we know by observing them; those we cannot tell, we know by dwelling in them.’  The great German poet, Rainer Maria Rilke also helps me when he writes: ‘Live the questions’ and some-day, in some way you will live into the answers.

Although Discernment does involve my use of ‘reason,’ the process is delicate and I too often stifle it by excessive analysis/thinking/reasoning.  I like Pascal’s observation: ‘The heart has its reasons that reason does not know.’

Discernment requires intuition and insight, ‘. . .for that which has not been told to them, they shall see, and that which they have not heard, they shall understand’ [Isa. 52:15].  As I respond in faith, rooted in reflective-action, I am more able to Discern.

When I immerse myself in the process of Discernment I have found that either I become more awake, aware, intentional and purpose-full as I walk with and am guided by God’s Spirit or if I deny, repress, or live in contradiction to it I invite internal havoc.  This leads to an inner struggle – a war within in, a jihad (the spiritual struggle within oneself).

Because the experiences, desires, wants and needs that form and inform my actions are at times conflicting and ambivalent, and because I am by nature imperfect and hence vulnerable to my capacity for self-deception, Discernment is often tentative and uncertain.  When this happens I do not feel a sense of having found the way or the truth or the light.  Ultimately, discernment requires my willingness and commitment to act rooted in faith and doubt as I strive to sense what God is calling me to do.

I am vulnerable.  This means, among other things, that I need to be willing to make mistakes.  I am more able to take the risk if I believe that God does, indeed, forgive me when I am wrong (NOTE: I have found that self-forgiveness is more challenging then believing in a forgiving God; I do not think I am alone when it comes to this challenge).

I have also found that in ‘obedience’ to Discernment, more Discernment will emerge.  I have also found that I need to be awake, aware, attentive, and alert if I am going to hear and understand ‘God’s Call’ and then act rooted in reflection.

I have also learned that there are certain conditions that help me Discern ‘God’s Call.’  Next time we will begin to briefly explore some of these conditions.

He who has ears, let him hear. –Matthew 24:15