GENTLENESS, A STRENGTH, PART II. . .

In our Christian inheritance, character traits like gentleness, kindness, patience and peace do not often take center stage. In the late 16th and early 17th centuries Francis de Sales stressed these traits. He called them the ‘little virtues’ and he believed that they were crucial to the Spirit-led life that Jesus invited us to lead. Francis sought to remind us – and he invited us to remind ourselves – to repeat Jesus’ words a hundred times a day: Learn of me, He said…that I am gentle and humble of heart. For Francis these words say it all: to have a heart gentle toward one’s neighbor and humble toward God.

As Christians we are called to Transformation [transformation = a fundamental change in character]. For Francis, and for those who came before him and for those who followed him, the transformed life is rooted in, is nurtured by, and is expressed by seven virtues: faith, hope, love, temperance, prudence, fortitude, and justice.

It seems to me that if one is rooted in these virtues, if one is nurtured by them, and if one strives to consistently express them – live into and out of them – then we will be transformed; we will experience a ‘fundamental change’ of our character. It is also crucial to understand that Francis is not suggesting that we live these ‘perfectly’ for we are imperfect beings; he is, I think, suggesting that we strive to live into and out of them more consistently – each of us can accomplish this. They are ‘common’ virtues but not ‘easy.’

For Francis, we are invited (or is it ‘challenged’) to put gentleness into practice in all circumstances. He was wise and noted that the first step was that one is to be gentle with one’s self. We are to love ourselves, to care for ourselves, and to be compassionate with ourselves – and to do so ‘wisely.’ There is a fine line between being selfish and being ego-centric; the first is a requirement for the health of our Physical, Intellectual, Emotional and Spiritual dimensions and the second is a path that we can easily choose to take; a path that will lead not to health but to dis-ease.

Francis knew that because we are imperfect we will more often ‘stumble the mumble’ than ‘walk the talk’ when it comes to being a follower of Christ. Thus, we must be gentle with ourselves – we must acknowledge our stumbles, we must seek forgiveness, we must reconcile and we must heal. The path to transformation is not a smooth path. The journey might well take a life-time. So being gentle with our self is crucial. Being gentle with our self enables us to be gentle with others as they travel their life-paths.

Let us be what we are and be that well, Francis wrote. We are called to be gentle as Jesus was gentle. We are called to love as Jesus loved. Any Christian who has sought to live into and out of these two virtues knows it takes great strength to do so. I leave us with more words from Francis. He writes: Don’t lose any opportunity, however small, of being gentle toward everyone… Trust in God. Rest in his care of you, confident that he will do what is best for you, provided that you, for your part, work diligently but gently. I say ‘gently’ because a tense diligence is harmful both to our heart and to our task and is not really diligence… I recommend you to God’s mercy. I beg him, through the same mercy, to fill you with his love.